Thursday, August 19, 2004

Sample of Application Requirements for "the future Mrs. TeacherDave"

  • Female (no budging on this one).
  • Politically/socially conservative, but not rabid or obnoxious about it (as attractive as Ann Coulter is, I would strangle her if I spoke with her for more than two minutes).
  • Practicing Christian (preferably Protestant, even more preferably Baptist) who believes in the moral authority of Scripture, the doctrine of the Trinity, the divinity of Jesus Christ, and the doctrine of salvation through faith in Christ alone. Must be active member of a church that teaches the afore-mentioned beliefs.
  • Loves children.
  • Enjoys at least one of the following: cartoons, theme parks, team sports, video games.
  • Must be well-read and intellectually curious. Strong admiration/attraction for writers a plus.
  • Music lover who appreciates at least two of the following: Counting Crows, U2, Wallflowers, Pink Floyd, Over the Rhine, Waterdeep, Jars of Clay, Ben Folds (Five).
  • Must enjoy/appreciate The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Almost Famous, Kill Bill, and any film involving John Cusack.
  • Cannot enjoy more than two of the following: Modern country music (Brooks, Twain, Chesney, etc.); American Idol; reality television; "Titanic"/"Pearl Harbor"; boy bands; any vocalists named Britney, Christina, Jessica, Avril, or Mandy; Meg Ryan; any Ben Affleck movie that is not directed by Kevin Smith.
  • Won't laugh at me for being a "Smallville" fan

The actual list is longer. But this gives you a good idea.

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