Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Big black boots, long brown hair.

It's always interesting when a recurring character makes a cameo appearance in the story. It puts the protagonist on the spot, and makes him re-examine himself to see if he's grown personally in the interim.

NewGirl resurfaced on Saturday.

I went to shoot pool with some friends at a somewhat upscale establishment, at least as far as poolhalls go. Nice place. Clean. Relatively smoke-free, which we can thank good ventilation for.

Getting ready to rack up the first game, I hear my name, and see her bound over, looking just as lovely as ever. We talk excitedly. I'm thrilled to see her, the first time we've spoken since, I don't know, last summer maybe. We go through the typical catching-up banter. She expresses interest in attending an upcoming church event, which I strongly encourage. She confesses she's joined another church, which I applaud. (She has commitment issues.) Then, somehow, the conversation turns back to her group, and she says, "That one's mine--there, in the blue shirt."

Ah.

Her new boyfriend. Tall. Slender, but muscular. Clean-cut. Nice-looking young man. Turns out he's in the military, and will be shipped out in a month. She says she tries not to think about that, and that she's still a bit in denial.

From there, the conversation peters out. She recommends a book, we talk a little about the Bible study I teach, and who is still attending that she remembers. But internally I completely disconnect. I try to play it off, to be just as friendly, but I think subconsciously my demeanor changed, and she noticed. So, we parted briefly, and retired to our groups.

Unfortunately, I had to go choose a cue. The closest rack was next to their table, so going to another rack would have been too obvious. I walked over, greeted some of her friends whom I had met before at a disappointing trip to the movies, and then was introduced to her new beau. His name is Dave, too! (Comment ironique!) Seems like a stand-up guy.

I returned to my table and tried valiently to focus on my game. I'm usually pretty lousy at pool, but playing distractedly, I was even worse. Occasionally, I'd allow myself to look over at their table. I see her pressed against him, dancing to Kelly Clarkson or whatever was playing over the juke. Or making out with him. Strenuously.

They left without saying goodbye.

And that was that. I may see her at the church event, though I wonder if she picked up on my unease somehow, and if that may make her reluctant to attend.

As a Bible study leader, I hope she attends, as I hope all of my friends and current/former classmates do.

As the guy who used to have feelings for her, and who feebly tried and failed to ask her out, I kind of hope I never see her again. She's beautiful, athletic, smart, loves my God, and loves baseball (although she *is* an Astros fan--blech!). She's The Package. And she's made it clear, indirectly but pretty clearly, that she's not interested. So yeah, I'm happy leaving her in the past.

Personal growth? I guess I haven't done enough of it.

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