Last night, I decided to take the ETL to the next level. So I decided to do something I've never done before: I'm letting you plumb the dregs of my MP3 collection.
Understand, these are all songs that I downloaded during college--the last time I had a decent internet connection at home. Yet, I've never been able to get rid of them. Either I still like them, or they have some sort of memory association that keeps them hanging around.
These are all songs that I downloaded on my own accord--not for any CD projects for others. (I still have a couple awful MP3's from one such project, and you don't have to be the New Kid on the Block to know that You Can't Touch This kind of thing with a ten-foot-pole.)
So here you go. The shameful admission. The worst of my MP3 collection.
Embrace the Lame Playlist:
1) Gettin Jiggy Wit It, Will Smith: Yes, I, too, had a brief Will-Smith phase. I blame Matt Romoser. Those of you who know him are nodding your heads. The sad thing is, I have about six songs from Big Willie Style on my compy. Yeah, I know.
2) Never Ever, All Saints: Whatever happened to these girls, they were so talented! Heh. Okay, not really. They were like a sad-eyed ballad version of Spice Girls. But this song was big while I was crushing hard my freshman year. I even went shopping with my crush and her friend, and in Foleys or wherever, the music video was playing on one of the TVs in the store. So yeah, connection there.
3) Secret Garden, Bruce Springsteen: Breaking out the sappy movie soundtrack songs, you betcha. This was the theme for my utter infatuation with Andria Smith, a girl from high school who has come to represent The One Who Got Away for me. She's like my "Maria," Mr. Duritz. And this song captured that.
4) Hard for Me to Say I'm Sorry, Chicago: Hells yeah. Cheesy? Check. But they are a legitimately talented band, so I have to give them credit. And they're a good part of the reason I exist today. My pop got the school band to play "Color My World" and he serenaded my mom at a high school basketball game, early in their dating relationship. That pretty much sealed the deal.
5) Easy Tonight, Five for Fighting: While "it's not easy to be" Five for Fighting, this was the first song that I heard by him/them. I actually really like this song, but liking a Five for Fighting song is tantamount to admitting liking a Creed song (Creed's first album rocked, so you chut-up!).
6) Iris, Goo Goo Dolls: The epitome of lame balladeering. Yet I still have the track. Wow. I would love to excuse this by connecting it to a girl or a certain memory, but I just really liked the song when it came out. Had that nice "unrequited love" vibe to it that I connected to so well.
7) It's My Life, Bon Jovi: Oh yeah. Dig that crazy smell of a stale career being warmed over. Really, it's the guitar I appreciate. And the fact that they're trying to do a modern "My Way" (which they even mention in the chorus. But the song is so overblown. C'mon, Jon, like anyone is trying to tell you how to live your life. With your big house and arena football team ownership and whatnot. That's right, haters; let the man "live while [he's] alive."
8) Now I Know Why You Wanna Hate Me (M:I2 Theme), Limp Bizkit: Okay, okay, FIRST of all, I really like the Mission:Impossible theme. And the best part of the song is the instrumental, "pure theme" part in the bridge (DUM DUM duh duh DUM DUM duh duh). That, and Fred saying, "I'm an idiot, a loser, microphone abuser." Cuz that's pretty much true. You know why we want to hate you, Fred? Because you're an abrasive, juvenile, no-talent thug, right? Oh, that wasn't the reason? Sorry, pal.
9) Come On, Eileen, Save Ferris: As fun as ska bands are, this song was lame when it was originally done. I like this version, however. Especially the hot lead vocals. Mmmm, band girls. *Homer-like drooling noise*
10) Big Rock Candy Mountain, Harry McClintock: I have the entire "O Brother..." soundtrack downloaded. That began my love for roots music. I don't know why, it just really appeals to me.
11) Every Rose Has Its Thorn, Poison: I have to take back the comment about "Iris." This song is the ultimate sappy lame ballad. Yet we all still know the song. Admit it; you know the words, and you catch yourself singing along. If I had "More than Words" downloaded still (I did, at one point), I would have packaged them together on this disc as a one-two-punch of cheesiness.
12) Take On Me, Reel Big Fish: I'm all about the 80's ska covers, it seems. I don't know--I like this song a lot, both the original version and the cover. If you don't like 80's music, I pity you.
13) When Doves Cry, "R+J" Soundtrack: I'm starting to appreciate Baz Luhrman's work on "R+J", despite the DiCrappines. This moment in the film, with the young choir, was a really nice touch. And come on, who doesn't love a Prince cover?
14) Little Miss Can't Be Wrong, Spin Doctors: I can already hear the protests out of Colorado. I know, dude, I enjoy them too. But by popular standards, the Spin Doctors are lame, lame, lame. At least today, they get some love.
15) I Want to Spend My Lifetime Loving You, Marc Antony and Tina Arena: The Mask of Zorro was a great movie, and this song fit it perfectly. I'm often a sucker for sappy ballads... in the right context, I guess.
16) Over My Head, Lit: From the "Titan A.E." soundtrack (a lot of soundtrack songs on here, it seems.) I... I don't know. I just don't know. A peppy tune, I guess. No other explanation.
17) Teenage Dirtbag, Wheatus: Retarded lyrics, retarded music. But yay for loser teenage dirtbags getting rocker chicks. That's fun.
18) Freakin It, Will Smith: Closing out with more from Big Willie. So careful to "lay one verse without a curse", Smith gives us the lamest song title in years. Like I said, blame the Marine that made me listen to this guy so much I downloaded it on my own.
There you go, friends. Enjoy the rest of ETL Day!
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