Hysterical Self-blindness... and Grace

I have a confession to make: I'm a crosswalk snob.

Explanation: I have to use the new, spiffy Houston Lightrail System to get from my parking lot to my building. It's one stop away. The train platforms sit between the northbound and southbound lanes. The only legal way to access said platforms is "the world's slowest crosswalk signal system."

Understand that there have been 31 (at latest count) accidents involving the train and cars/pedestrians since January. And every single one has had to do with people making illegal turns across the tracks or (in one case) a person not crossing when the "walking man" was illuminated.

Understand further that the penalty for jaywalking (crossing illegally) to/from said platforms is $200 dollars. Which I don't have.

So I am of the very small minority that actually waits for the light to turn, before crossing. (Of the hundreds that have crossed when I was watching, only a handful have actually waited for the light. Normally, it's just me.)

And my normally casual live-and-let-live attitude toward mundane daily activity has been subverted by self-righteousness. I wait for the light to turn. I am correct. The rest of you are lawbreakers and fools.

Now, I do have a point. It's stupid to ignore rules like this, for the simple fact that they are in place for the protection of pedestrians. And especially considering the fact that I'm no Olympic sprinter, this is a very good thing. Cuz folks down here drive crazy fast.

But this crosswalk snobbery also breeds a heinous hypocrisy, for one very clear reason.

I speed.

Not savagely, like one of my best friends from high school, who drove 95 in a 45 mph commercial district, just to see if he could. But I will go five to ten miles over the speed limit. Some will argue that this is not speeding. But yes, kids, it is. And it's a transgression of the traffic laws. I'm a lawbreaker.

The first impulse is to defend the speeding. To say, "come on, dave, don't be serious. this small *bending* of the so-called speed limit is no big deal. Really. With all the evil in the world, a little speeding is no big deal." And on some levels that's understandable.

But when we're talking about assuming the moral high ground, when we're talking about actual right and wrong instead of comparison among shades of grey, the answer is clear. I can't be a crosswalk snob and a speeder, without having a severe case of hysterical self-blindness. Because the law is the law.

I had a government prof in college, who believed that speeding is actually a sin in the eyes of God. Here's the logic: the speed limits are the law. God tells us to submit to authority, in all areas where that submission doesn't directly conflict with the His Word/Will. To break the law by speeding is to be rebellious and disobedient to authority, and is therefore a transgression of God's clear command to do otherwise.

I thought he was crazy. But I have to admit that, now, I agree with him. As I understand it, you cannot be a Christian, who claims to live by the command of Scripture and follow its principles, and speed in good conscience. You either have to be hysterically self-blind, or a liar, or you have to acknowledge that you are willfully sinning when you exceed the limits. I don't know, if there's another honest way to approach this conflict, I haven't found it.

What the point of this little story? The idea of lawbreaking is not one of degrees. Especially when it comes to spiritual laws. The Bible says that when you break the smallest of God's commands, you break the whole law. There is no second- or third-degree guilt in God's eyes. You are totally guilty or totally innocent. And if your human, there's no option of being totally innocent. Sorry kids. Innocent Jane has an innocent name, but she'll confess to you, everybody's guilty.

That's why grace is so incredible. Christ doesn't save us from our minor sins. He saves us from our breaking of the entire law. It doesn't take more grace for God to forgive mass murderers than it does to forgive kids who steal candy from convenience stores. They are both guilty in His eyes, and both require the same grace.

What this means is that no matter what you've done, whether small or great, you can be forgiven.

Even if it's from being a crosswalk snob, or going 75 in a 65 mph zone.